Saturday, May 18, 2013

The Struggle Within

Struggle.

It's a funny word isn't it? It's one of those words that looks and sounds like it's definition. You want to wrestle with it when you read it out loud. Look at it. It looks like it's just begging to be put in a headlock, doesn't it?

I've certainly had my share. Some are ongoing, nagging, but manageable. Some require prescription drugs. Others have punched me directly in the gut and knocked me to the ground, literally. These are the struggles that will be a part of me until the day I'm gone. These are the struggles that pay my therapist's car payments. But what I now know, is that these struggles are just part of me, they're not who I am. I don't let them define me. That's big.

Your struggles can either make you a stronger, more resilient person, or they can turn you into a resentful, angry jackwad. Depending on the day, I fall on both sides of that fence. I'm really a pretty nice guy, but struggle sometimes makes me defensive, bitter, overly-pessimistic and assholey at times. I don't mean to be, but when I let the struggle take over, I turn into somebody I don't like to be around. I'm working on that. Every. Single. F'ing. Day.

What I've learned most about struggle — everybody has one or two, or twelve. None of us are immune. Each and every one of us is dealing with something that causes pain, stress, worry, fear, regret. Each of us is fighting some kind of battle, big or small. (Those that say they're not struggling with anything and that life is "super great and joyful and glorious" — those are the people I'm afraid of most. But that's for another blog.)

So the next time you feel like putting a label on somebody based on who you think they are, remember, there's probably some kind of battle going on in there somewhere. Don't be too quick to judge.

And when it comes to your own struggles – just know that you're not alone.

Think about it. But don't overthink about it. I'll handle that part.

Have a good Saturday.
JS

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