Where there’s a who, there’s probably a how.
Remember that bully on the playground who thought it was funny to knock the smaller kids off the merry-go-round? It’s possible he was just an awkward kid going through an asshole stage. But maybe his rage was fueled by the daily ass-kickings he took from his never-sober dad. And maybe his dad is the reason he’s spent most of his adult life in and out of rehab.
What about that girl in high school who couldn’t seem to keep her pants on? Sure, she might’ve just been your run-of-the-mill slut. But maybe she hated herself, and her total lack of self-esteem left her searching for ways to feel wanted, and the only time that happened was when she was on her back.
That dude at work who always seems to have something else going on when you invite him to team happy hours. You know which guy I’m talking about. The one who always eats lunch all by himself. Maybe he hates everybody. Or, maybe he’s battling severe anxiety and the never-ending struggle to get through the day leaves him too mentally drained to deal with people.
Then there’s that guy who didn’t get married until he was in 40’s. He’s probably some kind of weirdo, right? Or, it could be he’s an overthinker with deep-rooted trust issues who for years found it easier to live on his own, inside his own head, where nobody else could get hurt.
See where I’m going here? Reasons. We all got ‘em. Every single one of us. Some have more than others. Some are more severe, some are more subtle. But they’re always there.
Now, I’m not suggesting that reasons are excuses. Reasons are reality, excuses are made up. And in many cases, reasons can be fucking brutal bastards with the power to beat you down. But with some hard work (and the right prescription meds) you can get your reasons to sit quietly in the background, only doing as much harm as you allow.
The real reason I bring it all up is this: you can’t get through life without having a few reasons of your own. But, when you take time to realize that everybody else has them too, you might be a little less quick to judge — others and yourself.
All that being said, some people just suck. And there’s really no reason for that.